Tips For Divorcing A Difficult Spouse
If you are married to a difficult or angry spouse, and plan to get a divorce, you already know how complex the divorce process can be. You are likely feeling overwhelmed just thinking about it. It is crucial that you prepare yourself before divorcing. The following are some actions you can take that can help make divorcing your spouse easier;
Tip #1: Organize Your Plans Before Anything
It is best for you to tell your spouse that you plan on divorcing him/her after you have details set in place. You do not want your spouse sabotaging the process. For example, gather critical documents before telling your spouse you intend to divorce. If your partner is physically abusive, create a safety plan beforehand. A safety plan is a set of actions that can help reduce your risk of being hurt by your spouse and/or protect your children from harm. In this event, it would be important to search out therapeutic and/or family support and guidance.
Tip #2: Document Everything
You could be faced with misrepresentation, accusations, or lies during your divorce. Unfortunately, your spouse’s lies could be believed since almost everyone can be charming if it serves a purpose. To protect yourself, you should document everything. Clear documentation can make defending yourself and supporting your side of the story easier.
Tip #3: Get a Lawyer
Find a lawyer with experience handling divorce cases involving a narcissistic spouse. You want to ensure you work with someone who understands the manipulation tactics your spouse may use.
You may qualify for pro bono services through a local bar association or local legal advocacy program if you cannot afford a lawyer.
Tip #4: Talk to a Therapist
It can be beneficial for you to talk to a therapist. Divorcing a difficult spouse can be an emotional nightmare. A therapist who has worked with difficult personalities, persons navigating a divorce, or those who have suffered verbal or other abuse can be of great help.
Tip #5: Get Support
Apart from getting a lawyer and speaking to a therapist, you should lean on your family and friends during this time. Family and friends can help prevent you from feeling like you are alone. You could also consider joining a support group for people navigating divorce.
Tip #6: Set and Implement Boundaries
It is vital that you set boundaries as you begin the divorce process. For instance, if you and your spouse must communicate, make it clear how he/she can reach you, such as by calling or going through your lawyer, using a divorce communication tool, etc.
Tip #7: Stay Calm
If you find yourself in a high-conflict divorce, it might be tempting to fight back; however, you must resist that urge. If you react emotionally, for example, angrily or irrationally, such a reaction might elevate your spouse’s narrative. For instance, if your spouse lies that you are an unfit parent and you react in anger, it could help support that lie. If you react angrily, you could be seen as someone who cannot control anger impulses.
Contact a Jacksonville Divorce Lawyer
If you are contemplating divorcing your narcissistic spouse, you may want to speak to a Jacksonville divorce lawyer at The Lasky Law Firm. You can reach us by calling 904-399-1644 or filling out our online contact form.
